I peer out across the landscape and I see you. I see your billboards and your banner ads and your TV commercials (hey, I really like the funny ones!) and I know you want me to buy, believe, or, at least, remember you. Don’t you call that “unaided awareness” or something? You spend money. I look your way.
I don’t know why, but I’ve been thinking a lot about you lately. I shop at your stores and buy your jeans and eat your cereal and occasionally, if I’m in the right mood, throw caution to the wind, and find I’m glad that my credit card is everywhere I want to be. But something has changed. I know more now. I know more about you… even if I don’t want to.
I’ll admit, I miss those more innocent “olden-timey days” (Sarah Silverman uses that phrase… she’s funny) when you could tell me something and, unless you REALLY messed up, I’d probably believe it. And so would 20,534,622 other people whom I didn’t even know existed. Boy, have times changed! With all these new social media tools, it’s like all the other “brand loyalists” are now my friends.
Even though I don’t really care about social media as a phenomenon, I do know a lot more about you than ever before. And I get most of this information from outside of traditional news channels. Heck, most of the time, the stuff isn’t even newsworthy… But that doesn’t stop my “friends” from sending it to me or me from forwarding it along if I find it interesting or funny.
How did we get here? I rarely reflect on exactly why I’m part of this chain, and yet here I sit… reflecting. When did I become your mouthpiece? Your advocate? Your gadfly (which would be a lot more fun… hiring?)? Why do I try to convince the people around me that you’re okay? Or not okay? Perhaps that’s the price of admission for all this free i-stuff.
Something’s not right though… it’s starting to bug me now that I think about it. Most of the time, when I’m dealing with news about you, you’re not even part of the conversation! I mean, someone says something lousy about you or something really bad happens with your product, and I then I see one of your ads all flowery and cheerful as if nothing ever happened! That REALLY bugs me.
Shouldn’t you be on top of this stuff? If I’m forced to deal with all of this real-time information and misinformation overload about you, then, at a minimum, you should be trying to deal with it, too. I know you won’t be perfect, but in this world, you get an “A” for effort! Sending out a press release three weeks after some disaster borders on being offensive… three weeks? C’mon! That’s ancient history!
Perhaps you could also avoid making silly mistakes like firing some minimum wage “associate” because they uploaded a video that amused MILLIONS of people but made your legal department nervous. You have to be smarter than that. The writing is on your “Friends” wall… all you have to do is read it!
Some of you guys seem to be figuring it out… Those Old Spice commercials were funny to begin with, but when the Old Spice Guy started talking to people commenting on him online? That was genius! They even figured out a way not to “jump the shark” as you media people say. Silver fish hand catch, indeed!
Like I said, I miss the old days, when I wasn’t burdened with every little chink in your armor, but the horses, as they say, are out of the barn! I’m not the only one out here fighting the good fight for you… there’s millions of us. Pop in and say, “Hi” once and a while. We’re just regular folk. If you continue to avoid dealing with us, it’s going to look like you just don’t care.
It’s time, don’t you think? It’s not like we haven’t given you some latitude. I mean Facebook just turned five years old! Isn’t that like 1000 Internet years? Step it up and join the party… Are you are waiting for a written invitation. Well, then… You are now cordially invited. 
Signed… Your Best Most Loyal Customer.
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